January 10, 2012 Filed in: Personal
My apologies to all for this blog being so overdue. I thought I would be moving into my new home about this time, but it looks like about another month is needed. Though most of my hard work is over, things that yet need to be done to pass inspection for me to move in are as such: Sewage system (which should be finished tomorrow), some gutters, cemented driveway, more dirt fill on both sides of the home, kitchen cabinets, appliances, carpets, installing air-conditioning units, and probably a few more things I can't think of mentioning.
I am doing well, although after over 4 months I am only now starting to feel somewhat better physically and not so exhausted. Numerous days after working I would plop into my recliner and fall asleep for several hours. Then I would feed my dog Sammo and take him out for a walk. I would then take a quick shower and go right to bed ~~ just too tired to cook or fix something to eat. At times I went to bed around 7pm or a bit earlier and stay there until 6 or 7 the next morning.
Funny ... a few weeks ago I was Skyping with some friends, and then I heard some laughter ... I fell asleep during the video chat ! haha! I will be glad when this house is all finished soon. E-mails keep piling up to almost 200 sometimes, and I haven't been in good contact with friends as I'd like. Even now, it's after 1:00am and I feel like I just need to go ahead and DO this blog.
At times, I still have waves of feelings for missing Trish, but God helps me through. I feel like I'm nearing the new season in my life for new openings for my ministry once again. I wonder how God may want to use me, and how extensively I will travel again (it's been about 13 years since my great activity of the 90's). I so desire to be relevant in ministry to what people, churches, etc. really need from the Lord. I still want to see the power of the Holy Spirit move as never before, convincing the world that Jesus is alive. I was communing with the Holy Spirit yesterday, contemplating how I wanted a consistent Presence of the Lord in my ministry that kept blessing the secrets of people's hearts.
I have continued to be worship leader in a Spanish church here in town. Also, I occasionally preach when asked, and have been doing it all in Spanish over the last year without interpreters (although I am not completely fluent yet). I still often think of Canada where I had so much effective ministry in the 90's, and also wonder if I will ever have my own music team as I desired in the past. Time and years have gone so quickly, and I am now a different Elias (I'm not sure of all that God has accomplished within me over the years, but I hope to be a much more effective minister now). Things are now so different without Trish.
Good story ~~ about a month ago, one Sunday morning about 6am I was awakened by sounds my dog was making. I got out of bed only to see him sadly not being able to walk. He was dragging himself with his two front legs, and looking at me with sad eyes as if he was communicating "Papa, I won't be around much longer". He also made a mess which I cleaned up. I cried so hard. Before leaving him alone in the house to go to church, I got on the floor next to him and just cried. He sweetly pressed his head into my chest as if he understood my pain (he did something similar to me the last couple days before Trish died).
When I returned several hours later from church, I still felt sadness as I looked for him where I left him, but strangely he was way across into the living room. I was now wondering how he got there, because it would have been such a long distance to drag himself. By the way, I was also contemplating taking him to the vet the following day, and even chose a place to bury him on my new property. Anyway ... without much hope, I got his leash ready like usual, and got his attention for me to take him outside for a walk. Although I prepared myself to cry again, he got up with unexpected strength, and has been walking fine ever since!
Words cannot convey what Sammo means to me. As I've been building the new home, I have often felt how Trish was no longer around to enjoy it with me, and then the thought of Sammo suddenly being needed to be 'put down' because of loss of walking abilities ... well, that meant it would be only me moving in, having lost my two great close friends in life. Sammo's healing was one of the most dramatic I've seen in a while. God has given me more time with him, and I love it.